I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
