my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
