please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
