I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
