I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Randomize
