i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
