Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
