I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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