If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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