YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
