You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
My sheets look like a crime scene.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Randomize