My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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