wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
