You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
