Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
