It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
