so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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