I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
