People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I just gargled with NyQuil
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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