Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
