You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
