did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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