Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
So vagazzling was a success
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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