Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
