Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
