I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
