I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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