...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
