never play flip cup with pint glasses
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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