we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
third nipple confirmed
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
