bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
