i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
The feeling are messing with the penis
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
The convent might be a nice break from real life
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
