Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
