I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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