to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Blow job season was short but glorious.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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