this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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