Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
