why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
