Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
