He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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