went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
This baby is an asshole
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
