mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
