Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
