why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
