Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
