Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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