I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
His nipple licking is glorious
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
