yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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