Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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