Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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